Skip to main content

About your Search

Search Results 0 to 31 of about 32 (some duplicates have been removed)
Comedy Central
Sep 27, 2012 10:55am PDT
more on the n.f.l. labor dispute we go now to senior correspondent john oliver outside n.f.l. headquarters in new york. john, what is the status right now of the n.f.l. dispute? >> well! (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) >> who families both alike in dignity, one the referee, the other the league of national football is locked in dispute ages old. oh fair referees! (laughter) shirts bestripes arms akimbo with only a flag and wheus toll examine desperation and fair n.f.l. battered but unbowed like henri at agincourt from this day to the ending of the world! (cheers and applause) but we shall be remembered. we few, we happy few, we band of brothers! (cheers and applause) >> jon: my god. my god. that's-- (cheers and applause) i'm just-- i'm sorry. it just-- holy (bleep)! i was just-- (laughter). john oliver, you have almost overnight improved exponentially. (laughter) john oliver, john oliver, you moved me. >> yes, 'tis i, john oliver in the flesh. (laughter) the clown prince of correspondents, bob your ankle, up your bum! (cheers and applause) >> jon: i have to say th
Comedy Central
Sep 4, 2012 11:00am PDT
? >> jon: all right, everybody. we get the point. we're going to go to john oliver on the floor of the election. john? >> jon, thank you. i could not disagree more with my colleagues. if the democrats are tapping anything, it's not the rockies but their own smug sense of self satisfaction. they chose denver not for its association with the faste american beverage but its sheer height, a city literally a mile above the rest of america. for which these liberal -- from which these liberal elites can peer down upon the rabble, judging whether or not we're separating paper from plastic and hurling energy-saving lightning bolts from us on high as were once hurled down from olympos. jon? >> jon: rob? >> what's up? >> jon: rob? >> what's up? >> jon: rob, we're not doing that any more, rob. we're not doing it. what is your opinion, rob, on the elitist versus salt of the earth ker if you havele with the democrats? -- salt of the earth kerfufrnsle with the democrats? >> i can tell you that democrats love government that's fair -- universal health care, and twins. >> >> hit it. ♪ they love hunti
Comedy Central
Sep 5, 2012 12:35am PDT
john oliver downtown which for some reason he showed up now which i think we can all agree -- excuse me. [laughter] >> jessica. you have been asked into the hall of fame. is that why the democrats chose charlotte gives them a nod to the white male voter. hey we're thinking about you too, is that symbolism, is that fair to say. >> no, not really. do you know what, i don't think so. i think it's more that nascar is a metaphor for the democrat party, okay. just riding around and around in circles covered with the logos of companies that own them. and you know they're thinking of them says, we're getting somewhere, right. we're beewe've been in this care hours. never quite realizing everyone else is here waiting for them to flame out in a giant wreck. [laughter] [applause] it's not -- >> no. >> all right. you're at the convention center. >> that's right, jon. charlotte, fun facts, some of the names here at the convention center. >> that's a great choice. shark will you tell icharlotte , it's great for the democrats. >> yes, that's the connection between the democratic convention and the hun
Comedy Central
Sep 17, 2012 10:55am PDT
... i am a lazy as (bleep). (laughter) for more, our political correspondent john oliver. john, thank you for joining us. (cheers and applause) what a night. a lot of story telling by people who have been personally affected by obama's actions. >> jonactions.. >> and they're not alone, jon, i, too, have been touched by this president in a personal way. >> jon: jon, is that an immigration related issue? >> no, it isn't, bad guess. >> jon: all right. (laughter) jon, last year while covering a white house peres briefing i choked on a hot dog. (laughter) as i felt my life slipping from me suddenly there was president barack obama leaping over the rose bushes to catch me before i hit the ground! cradling my head gently upon his lap just like that he thrust his own fingers down my throat just so, yanked the obstruction clear and then as sweet oxygen filled my lungs once again he said the words that i will never forget. "can we get this man another hot dog?" (cheers and applause) >> jon: really. >> yes. yes. >> jon: he said you can have another hot dog? >> yes, he did. >> jon: you had just c
Comedy Central
Sep 18, 2012 7:15pm PDT
. for more on this i'm joined by john oliver live in cairo. john, how is everything going? what's happening? >> what's happening. jon, it's beautiful here, jon. friendly people. rich history. delicious food. i'm having a fantastic time >> jon: really? that's great >> not really, jon. of course not. have you been near a [bleep] television recently? things are pretty bad around here. look, i think it's important for us all to pause and note that it is clearly not the majority of muslims who are protesting in the streets. it's not even the majority of protestors who are getting violent. to put this in context, we should really remember islam's young age. >> jon: it's 1400 years old exactly, jon. in religious years islam is still just a teenager. put it in context. think what christianity was doing when it was only 1400 years old. >> jon: no, that's not... ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: yeah, i guess that is. .. >> exactly. bloody crusades, the inquisition, execution of hair ticks. christianity is just lucky there weren't cell phones around then to film that [bleep]. >> jon: you know
Comedy Central
Sep 11, 2012 12:40am PDT
of saying that. we are joined by jon, our correspondent john oliver: >> you obviously, you were on the floor and saw the speech last night. >> i did, jon, and it really hit home for me. >> i guess because my parents once owned a small business, a candle emporium in akron, ohio. in 2009, president obama visited and promised it would become the biggest candle company in the world. two weeks later it burned to the ground in a terrible beautifully tainted fire. obviously i still tear up whenever i smell lavender. >> jon: right. it is a powerful story. obviously none of that is true. your parents are defense in england. >> that is not the point, jon. what was the theme of last night's convention? >> jon: we can change it. >> exactly. and that is what i have just done. last night's theme i chose to change facts, reality and the meaning of words in order to make a much larger point. >> jon: but you can't do that. what you need to do is -- you don't ignore the truth when it doesn't support your purple. >> you can when you are trying to save your country from a socialist tyrant. >> jon: who
Comedy Central
Sep 11, 2012 7:15pm PDT
. john oliver, everybody. we will be right back. >> jon: right before mitt romney's succession speech conventioneers will as always be exposed i mean treated to a brief biographical film about the nominee. you may not have seen it, luckily we have received it, received an advanced copy of said film and as a public service we would like to show you mitt romney's biographical film shown at the convention. >> this year, the american people face a choice between a self-made businessman. >> i know how extraordinarily difficult it is to build something from nothing. >> and a radical collectivist who says things like. >> if you have a business you didn't build this. >> i was not born in this country. >> and the leader of al qaeda. >> this i is the story of mitt romney, a human being who built that. >> george w romney was a well with think auto executive and future michigan governor, but being born his son was anything but luck. little mitt romney won the coveted position only by outcompeting thousands of less motivated sperm. and though when he was a teenager the romney family was for a time
Comedy Central
Sep 25, 2012 10:45am PDT
and applause ) >> jon: john oliv >> jon: welcome back to the show. as we've seen seeing, a lot of unrest and anger in the middle east this past week. the condemnation of obama has been swift and furious >> this leading from behind obama doctrine is up in flames >> terrorists believe they can attack our embassy with impunity, they believe the killr ambassador and there will be no response >> how much longer can we afford to spill our blood and treasure trying to, quote unquote, promote democracy in places that do not have any values for civilized society. >> jon: yes. democracy promotion is wrong. that's a somewhat isolationist position, ex-governor palin. does anyone see our role in the world differently? yes, you 2008 still governor palin >> i see our role in the world as one of being a force for good, to help these rising smaller democratic countries that are just, you know, they're putting themselves on the map right now >> jon: what a bold freedom agenda. it's a little bit naive. i mean, think of the blow-back >> egyptians elected a muslim brotheredhood member to head their co
Comedy Central
Sep 4, 2012 12:35pm PDT
obama's speech from afar. here is our own john oliver with a report from last night -- the very heart of hopeness. ♪ >> from the opening moments, it was obvious that this was a historic occasion of gravitas, and significance. ♪ baby, clapping like this ♪ let the sunshine let the sun shine in ♪ >> jon: how do you think obama's going to deal with the situation in south ossettia? >> he will do everything right for america. >> jon: what is he going to do? >> he's going to put american families back to work, and create jobs here in america, and give us health care benefits so we can afford to live right here in america. >> i'm just worried about the sound bites. there is no real substance to it. of course, it wasn't all about issues. there were some lighter moments. >> before he entered the white house, abraham lincoln's experience in elective office consisted of eight years in the state legislature in springfield, illinois and one term in congress. >> and just six short hours later, obama took the stage. >> obama, obama, obama. >> it's difficult. i'll get it. nearly. >> obama. obama.
Comedy Central
Sep 4, 2012 11:30am PDT
longer clinton and what about george clinton he could bump things up senior a analyst john oliver joins us right now. thank you very much. [cheers and applause] >> and that is a high altitude. >> sea level.john, hillary neede a strong statement of support for barak obama. she made several of them. >> john: did she, jon jo.jon: i. >> john: did you.jon: i just sa. play the clip. >> hillary: no way, no how, nom. >> john: she never said shelaidr said she was human garbage. that would have sent a signal of support. >>jon: what about this. hillary: what about this barak owobama is my candidate and he s going to be president. >> john: she didn't say when.20. did you see her outfit she could have chose a more supported look than an tan tangerine pant suit. >>jon: you want this contest. >> that is the shore yo story sn ridicule me. i'm only doing it because it's fun and easy and i have time to kill. i used to be like you thinking the party would come together until i spent the entire evening finding a woman to under cut that theory. >>jon: did you? >> o >> john: i was at the pepsicent. are you r
Sep 10, 2012 12:00pm PDT
was oliver north. and then john warner recruits a moderate republican attorney general, four candidates' race. >> a thriller. >> here is the line that decided the race. let's play it. >> you know something about my opponent. my opponent is a document shredding, constitution trashing commander in chief bashing ayatollah loving, arms dealing, criminal protecting, resume enhancing, swiss banking, law breaking, letter faking, self-serving, snake oil salesman who can't tell the difference between the truth and a lie. >> wow. >> the tail end of the campaign. final days. he pulls away 46%, 43%. oliver north's dreams ended right there. >> that is the perfect movie for you. >> i know, right? >> all right. well, before we go, we have some news. there's a new member of the cycle team, charlie hitchins and his wife who also works at msnbc welcomed their new beautiful baby daughter today. this is little clare victoria hitchins named after the county in ireland where dad's side of the family is from. mom and dad and big sister sidney are all doing great. congratulations. still ahead, why w
Sep 11, 2012 11:00pm EDT
marie beckles carl john bedigian michael earnest beekman maria a. behr yelena belilovsky nina patrice bell debbie bellows stephen elliot belson paul m. benedetti denise lenore benedetto bryan craig bennett eric l. bennett oliver duncan bennett margaret l. benson dominick j. berardi james patrick berger steven howard berger john p. bergin alvin bergsohn daniel bergstein michael j. berkeley michelle berkley. and my uncle, james gray, we'd love you and miss you. >> and my husband, i love you everyday and miss you everyday. so do the kids. the boy started college. i know you'd be proud of them. maria is in middle-school and doing great. say hello to goldie and david torres. i love you. donna m. bernaerts david w. bernard william bernstein david m. berray david s. berry william reed bethke timothy betterly paul beyer edward frank beyea bella j. bhukhan anil tahilram bharvaney peter alexander bielfeld shimmy d. biegeleisen brian bilcher william g. biggart carl vincent bini mark bingham. joshua david birnbaum gary eugene bird george john bishop albert balewa blackman, jr. jeffrey donald bitt
FOX News
Sep 11, 2012 6:00am PDT
. >> oliver bennett. >> margaret l. benson. >> james patrick burger. >> steven howard burger. >> john p. bergen. >> alvin birdsong. >> daniel david burgstein. >> michelle j. berkeley. >> my uncle, firefighter james gray, we love you and miss you. >> my husband, i love you every day and miss you every day and so do the kids. the boys just started college. i know you would be so proud of them. and maria is in middle school right now and she's doing great. say hello to golly for us. i love you. bill: live look at ground zero. family members and victims reading names of those lost with those personal touches that we hear every time this year. we await a moment of silence right now, marking the instant that united airlines flight 175 struck the south tower of the world trade center. that's where we start this morning as we move through this event together as a nation. welcome here to our coverage. i'm bill hemmer. how are you, martha? martha: i'm doing fine. good morning bill. good morning everybody. i'm martha maccallum. as we all remember 11 years later 9:03 a.m., september 11th, 2001 was
Sep 6, 2012 11:00pm EDT
willing to give up to get that olive branch. >> greg, with respect, he's always said this, the principles of bowles/simpson, then when it comes to push versus shove, he walks away from it. >> larry, you're wrong about that. >> john, i'm not wrong about that. >> hold on a second. listen. listen. barack obama and paul ryan both proposed the same am of deficit reduction over ten years. $4 trillion. they proposed different ways of achieving it. the president calls for less spending cuts, some revenues. paul ryan is doing it without any tax revenues. they're proposing the same amount of deficit reduction, and the way in which they're different, that is to say that president obama relying on some tax cuts mirrors what the principles of bowles/simpsons are. what was bowles/simpson? spending cuts and tax increases. republicans have not embraced that formula. >> my biggest beef, look, ryan has tremendous spending reduction. they're not cuts. most of them are just a lower growth rate of spending, putting this massive budget back to about 2007 or 2008 where it belonged. but obama keeps ma
Search Results 0 to 31 of about 32 (some duplicates have been removed)